Sunday, August 23, 2009


You know that scene in Bambi, when Thumper said "Kinda wobbly, isn' t he?" Well that is how I feel in my newly (and chronic) single status. I feel like my legs are brand new and that they don't work very well at the moment. I feel like it is shear will power that is keeping my feet under me most days and I am scared most of the time because of the fact that this new, wobbly legs of mine could just slip out from under me at any time and leave me hurt and crumpled on the floor below me. But, while the fear of reoccuring pain is strong, so is the will to stand tall and straight on my own again. I know that even in all this fear and wobbliness, there is something positive and wonderful too. There is a newness which is awesome, like the colors of the world are different now (maybe not brighter, but new somehow) and there are adventures waiting for me when I am strong enough and ready to embark on them. There is also something positive in the strength that is building in these new single legs as I take baby Bambi steps forward. So while the fear and pain sometimes consumes me, the strength and newness keeps me going forward one wobbly step at a time. (and to those Thumpers in my life, you know...the ones that help me get back on my wobbly legs when I slip on the ice... thank you!)

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