Monday, September 7, 2009

More Silly Married People Sayings...

This past weekend I was visiting a good single friend in North Carolina. She is also in her 30s like me and being around her was wonderful for me as she helped me gain some good and positive perspective on being single. But we did have a good chat about those sayings that married people like to say to single people. I've heard these sayings from my own married friends and I know that they have the best of intentions but if you are married and reading this or you have married friends that say this to you, send them this blog entry and tell them to STOP saying these things to their single friends. It's not uplifting, or encouraging. I know they only want to help, but as said in a previous entry, take the single person out for drinks or dinner and have a NORMAL conversation that has nothing to do with marital status or lack thereof. Okay, with that disclaimer said... go ahead and read some of the sayings below and feel free to add your own or your own comments about the sayings that married people say to single people...

1) "Sometimes I wish I were still single, you have it so easy when you are single." Um... okay, yea... so then why did you get married?! If single life is all you think it is or should be, then why did you get married?!?! Married people, we single people understand the benefits of being single and yet some of us still want to get married so telling us that being single is better really does nothing for us. *sigh* People want what they don't have I guess...

2)"Singleness is a gift." WHAT?!?! from who? And what exactly is it a gift for? Being single has tons of benefits, but I wouldn't call it a gift... perhaps a fun time or a time in your life for focusing on yourself but a gift? Hmmm... I have trouble figuring out that one. I mean, if it is such a gift, then why does EVERYONE get it at some point in their life? Why are some forced to have the "gift" for longer than others....

3)"I'm so glad I don't have to date anymore" HAHAHAHA... this is not encouraging, married people. You don't make single people feel better about entering the jungle of dating each time they have a failed relationship when you say that you are so happy that you don't have to do that. It's like saying you are so glad you don't have to get dressed anymore. Dating is rough, but it can be a ton of fun. But it is also scary to get back into when you are getting out of a relationship and so when you tell us with the best sympathy faces you can muster that you are so glad it isn't you, it really discourages us.

Well, that is what I have come up with so far... I am sure that I will hear more or remember more as I walk deeper in my life of being single. :)

2 comments:

  1. I got a great married person comment today..

    "girl, my husband is such a slob - he has such nasty gas last night I just about died...but bein' single? oh lord, I'll take slobs and gas anyday.."

    Wow, really? Gee, good to know my singleness ranks BELOW stink and shit...lol...

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  2. hmmm what about "God has something to teach you during this time...." or.... "you have so much freedom..." or "don't worry, Mr./Ms. Right is just around the corner..."
    I think your previous blog entry on this topic hit the nail right on the head. I know I really took it to heart.

    I also think Jen's advice about making your own closure is DEAD on... i know my own experience in attempting to gain closure has never been anything but horrendously frustrating and just added to my hurt.

    Thanks for sharing with us and making yourself vulnerable to us and for the benefit of other singles who read this blog

    I love you!!!

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