Sunday, December 16, 2012

Red Flag #5: Clothes

This mostly stems from one relationship.  It was the last serious relationship I had (pretty much the only one... who am I kidding?!?! hahaha).  One of the best things about the man in that relationship was that he loved to buy me outfits and clothes.  He would often call me and ask my size and then when I would show up at his house, there would be a new outfit on the bed for me to wear out.  Sounds like a fairytale, right?  I felt like it was too, until everything ended.  I began to look at the clothes that he picked out for me and preferred me to wear.  I began to notice that a lot of the clothes weren't things I would ever pick for myself.  I wasn't comfortable in the fit of some of them. I felt like my personal style had changed and I never even noticed it happening.  I've always been the kind of woman who knows her body type and tends to dress to suit it best and suddenly I had all these things that didn't fit me or my body well.  Of course it took me a long time to change back to things that I felt sexy or beautiful in... but I did it eventually and as I prepared to write this series, I noticed that this could be a red flag.  My ex fell for me as I was, but even down to my clothes, he made subtle changes to what he thought I should be.  And now that I look back, that is a red flag.  It's nice that he wanted to buy me things or would see and outfit and could see me in it, but it was a red flag that slowly raised itself so that I didn't even know it was there and maybe that is the scariest kind.
So take a look at your relationship.  Have you changed your style to suit your partner?  Have you noticed that things that made you feel beautiful are no longer in your closet? Do you notice that you dress to suit his style and not your own?  If that's whats happening, it might (MIGHT) be a clue that more is wrong in your relationship... just maybe.

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